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Stupidfuck Training to Become Dumbfuck

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MORON VALLEY, MINNESOTA -- Marcus Palumbozo is a stupidfuck. He has all the certifications he needs for the federal government to recognize his stupidfuck...

Screeching, Racist Broom Handle In A Blonde Wig Will Fill In While Tomi Lahren...

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LA CULERA RUBIA ARRUGADA, CALIFORNIA -- Fox News has announced that one of their contributors will be on a self-imposed quarantine after she was...

Trump Orders Facebook and Twitter to Force Users to Like and Follow Him

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's been no big secret around the nation's capital that President Donald Trump is very concerned with his social media presence,...

Trump Records Christmas Single for Charity: “White Power Christmas”

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HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA -- American record label U.S. Capitol Records announced this week that it will be teaming up with President Donald Trump to record...

Man Burning Cross in MAGA Hat Says Democrats Are the ‘Real Racists’

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WALLACE, GEORGIA -- A man in a MAGA hat burning a cross on the lawn of his black neighbor is not a racist, he...

This Cat ‘Pretty Sure’ He’d Be a Better President Than Donald Trump

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NEW CATFORD, NEW YORK -- Mr. Whisker Bottoms is a Feline-American. He is currently residing in the same home with the same family he's been...

Did Epstein Run Black Market Pizza Joints Using a Pedophile Ring as Cover to...

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Undoubtedly, the arrest of billionaire Jeffrey Epstein on multiple charges of sex trafficking minors stands to be the biggest story of...

Fearing Another Whistleblower, President Bans Tea Kettles From White House

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, the President of the United States issued an edict, demanding that all whistles and things that can whistle be...

League of Latinx Voters Puts Out Pamphlet: “5 Reasons To Re-Elect Donald Trump For...

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President of the United States, and Head Stable Genius at MENSA, Donald J. Trump, has said that despite his inflammatory and clearly racist rhetoric...

Spicer Already Booked For Next Season of “Dancing With the Lying Kleptocratic Fascist Lawless...

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HOLLYWOOT, CALIFORNIA -- Former White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer has been having the time of his meaningless, worthless, scruple-free life on ABC's hit...