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Middle-Aged Man Should Probably Be Better at Fucking By Now

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LAGO DEL FLACIDO, CALIFORNIA -- Skip Languido is a 42 year old financial planner and he and his second wife are in the middle...

Trump Campaign Buys Hundreds of Thousands of Tiki Torches in Anticipation of Rally Crowd...

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump's re-election campaign issued a financial report today containing details of a large wholesale purchase of over half a...

Look at This Obsequious, Pudgy Cunt Corrupting Our Justice Department at the Behest of...

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The following is a profane op-ed written by some fuck-o who owns this website: Just look at this obsequious, pudgy cunt. He's out there, taking...

Illinois Nazis Re-Endorse Donald Trump for President

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Donald Trump racks up another endorsement.

Trump’s Budget Seeks Additional $2T For “Hamberders, Covfefe, and Golf Trips”

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Trump administration released its 2020 budget proposal on Monday, and while the usual team of surrogates and supporters rallied around...

Trump Wants Impeachment Witnesses Shipped Off to Border Camps

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WASHINGTON, D.C -- President Donald Trump wasted no time at all seeking his retribution on administration officials who testified -- mostly all under subpoena...

Devin Nunes Assures Trump He Won’t Stop Sucking Him Off Even Though Impeachment Trial...

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sources are reporting that late last night, Congressman Devin Nunes delivered via Bovine Express -- a service that courriers mail via...

Ted Cruz: “The Democrats Just Learned You Can’t Impeach a Monarch in a Coronation...

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It was never any big secret on the Hill. President Donald John Trump, the third impeached president in American history, was...

Murkowski Knows OJ Did It, But Glad He Got Off Anyway

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- When it's all said and done, Senator Lisa Murkowski of Alaska  is "just not all that much a fan of holding...

Lung Cancer Devastated to Find Out It Has Advanced Rush Limbaugh

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Lung Cancer shocked the carcinogenic community today when it revealed what it called a "truly devastating diagnosis." At a press conference earlier today, Lung...