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“Why I Should Be President” by Senator Ted Cruz
Read why Senator Ted Cruz thinks you should elect him next year.
Obama’s Voting Proposal Outrages Another 12% of Americans Into Possibly Voting
A new poll shows President Obama's compulsory voting idea has inspired another 12% of Americans to maybe, possibly vote next time around.
Election Watch: KY GOP ‘Totes Cool’ With Rand Paul Embarrassing Himself in 2016
Rand Paul has convinced Republican leadership in his state to front a plan that would allow him to run for both President and the Senate.
Socialist Barack Obama’s Capitalist Economy Adds 295,000 Jobs, Unemployment Down to 5.5%
Republicans react to President Barack Obama's economy having another month with nearly 300,000 jobs added and the unemployment number dropping further.
Scott Walker ‘Not Even Sure Obama is Human’
Is there anything about Obama that Scott Walker is "sure" of?
Rudy Giuliani: ‘I’m Not a Racist. I’m a Pandering Asshole’
Rudy Giuliani says he he didn't make racist comments; he was just pandering to other, IRL-racists.
Jeb Bush Has No Comment About the Stinking, Flaming Dog Shit on His Doorstep
Jeb Bush doesn't want to discuss anything in the past, no matter how glaring, terrible and stinky.
“How Real Patriots Eat (A Lot Less)” by Congressional Republicans
Congressional Republicans are looking to help a lot of poor Americans lose a ton of weight. By eating a lot less. Because they won't be able to buy food.
Obama Uses Nobel Prize to Stuff ISIS War Powers Authorization Into Envelope
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It takes a whole lot of pages to ask Congress for permission to start a new war, and all those pages...
Chris Christie Looking Into Constitutionality of Being President While Incarcerated
Are rumors true of the Christie 2016 camp looking into running the country from prison?
