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Sarah Huckabee Sanders Eager for First Meal From Her Home Trough
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders announced her resignation today, and will be leaving the Donald Trump presidential administration in...
Trump Gets Terrible Case of Freedom Gas and Blames Farts On Sarah Huckabee Sanders
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump ate "way, way, way too many chilli dogs" this morning while tweeting during his executive time, and as...
President’s Plane Rechristened “Air Force Individual-1”
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump's aircraft has been officially rechristened.
"Because we want everyone to understand who's always flying in this plane, we thought...
Trump Economic Adviser: Eliminating Minimum Wage Will Result in 0% Unemployment
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The man who will potentially take over for outgoing White House economic adviser Kevin Hassett told reporters today that the Trump...
President Trump Threatens to Sue ‘Any American’ That Doesn’t Vote to Re-Elect Him
Not going to vote for Donald Trump? Consider yourself sued.
Donald Trump Jr. To Undergo Plastic Surgery For Rare Facial Condition
NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- The president's son will be undergoing a radical, experimental new plastic surgery procedure, and the hope is that when...
President Trump Declares National Emergency When He Runs Out of Chicken Nugget Dipping Sauce
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sources within the White House are confirming that this morning, at approximately 7:45 am a state of national emergency was declared...
Trump Offers Wall Compromise to Dems: Build a Retractable Dome Instead
WASHINGTON. D.C. -- President Trump backed off threats to implement new tariffs on Mexican goods as the United States and Mexico worked out the...
McConnell Confident Trump Can Fit It All In There
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- At a hastily convened press conference this afternoon, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell forcefully insisted that the entirety of whatever it...
Boston Straight Pride Parade Gives Mike Pence Full-On Chubby
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Whether or not the city of Boston permits a "straight pride" parade later this summer, sources close to enough to smell...
