Hillary Clinton Circling Jared Kushner’s Home Shouting, ‘Lock Him Up!’

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — Former Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton has reportedly been circling the home that Jared Kushner, son-in-law and top adviser to President Donald Trump, shares with First Lady and Daughter Ivanka Trump in the nation’s capital in a late model sedan. Ms. Clinton has been seen by several eyewitnesses slowing down, sticking her head out of the driver’s side window, and shouting various repeated phrases at the house. Law enforcement officials have indicated that at this time there is no violation of any law that Clinton is committing and she’ll be allowed to circle Kushner’s home as long as that remains the case.

“Lock him up! Lock him up! Lock him up,” Clinton has been heard screaming at Kushner’s house for going on four solid hours now.

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At this time, Ms. Clinton has not stopped circling Kushner’s house long enough to answer any questions from the press, however sources close to her say that she was inspired by news breaking of Kushner using both a public email address and a private address on a private server on a family-owned domain.

White House Senior Adviser Jared Kushner has used both a private email account and an official email address to communicate with other government officials, according to his attorney. Responding to media reports about Kushner’s email habits, his lawyer said, “All non-personal emails were forwarded to his official address.” (NPR)

The appropriateness and legality of using personal email servers for official communiques became a central theme of last year’s presidential campaign, and several of President Trump’s campaign surrogates could be seen at rallies demanding that Ms. Clinton be “locked up” for allegedly committing crimes when she herself used a personal email server while Secretary of State. Ultimately, though former FBI Director James Comey took the exceedingly rare steps to speak about the bureau’s investigation into Clinton’s private server use, the FBI still ended up clearing Clinton of any wrongdoing.

“Obviously Hill-Dawg was a little fired up after she read that shit,” one source close to Ms. Clinton told us, “and why shouldn’t she be? It’s not Trump Family hypocrisy that surprises us anymore, it’s Republicans in congress who know better that are ignoring his craziness and hypocrisy that surprise us most.”

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Another source close to the situation tells us that Ms. Clinton doesn’t truly want Kushner prosecuted or jailed for using a personal email server. Instead, they suggested she is just trying to draw awareness to what she feels was an undue focus on her own usage of private email servers. Hopefully, our source tells us, when news of Kushner’s private server spreads, it might put to rest some of the lingering rumors and conspiracy theories about her.

“But, let’s be real. That’s probably not going to happen. Instead, Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity will make up reasons that it’s totally different when Kushner does it,” our source tells us.

Reached for comment, President Trump said he is “outraged and infuriated” by Clinton’s “egregious lack of respect for a president and their family.”

“Crooked Hillary is acting crooked as always,” Trump says in a released statement, “and that leaves me outraged and infuriated by her egregious lack of respect for a president and their family. What’s she going to do next, ask me for my birth certificate or imply I murdered a family friend and then make me the center of a political witch hunt over a blow job?”

This story is developing.


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