Yearly Archives: 2021

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Totally Bulls*it News

Palin Says It’s Time for Boebert and Greene to Return the Brain Cell She Let Them Borrow

"I guess I just forgot how much rock-ribbed, dyed-in-the-wool, true blue patriotic conservative thought can be done with a single brain cell."
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Matt Gaetz Won’t Be Subway’s New Spokesperson After All

MILFORD, CONNECTICUT -- As of just three weeks ago, Congressman Matt...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Trump Confused by Gaetz Paying Someone BEFORE They Had Sex With Him

"I usually gotta cut them a six figure check after we're done so they don't tell anyone how small it is."
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Babylon Bee Publishes The N-Word “Satirically”

Fans of comedy and satire might not recognize anything that the...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

New Study: The More You Talk About Stolen Elections, The Lower Your IQ

The National Institute of Researching Shit has released the results of...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Jesus Says It’s Okay to Pray That Trump Dies Before 2024

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- Americans who find themselves praying that...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

GOP Chair: ‘White Lives Matter’ Rallies Draw Bigger Crowds When Trump Holds Them

The chair of the Republican Party thinks white lives matter rallies would draw bigger crowds if they brought back Donald Trump to speak at them.
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Roy Moore and Matt Gaetz Announce 2024 Run as President and VP

"You know us; we like to get in there as early as possible."
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Manchin Joins The Might-As-Well-Be-A-Republican Party

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, Senator Joe Manchin filed official paperwork,...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Gaetz: “Every Fetus Deserves a Fighting Chance to Become My Sex Object In 17 Years”

While the scandal surrounding him may not be showing any signs...
James Schlarmann -
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