Yearly Archives: 2020

Alabama Teen Sent to Urgent Care With Uncle’s Babies In Her Eye

COU-ROUGE COUSIN SEXE PARISH, ALABAMA -- Doctors and attending staff in...

Bill Barr Is Totally Outraged (Wink, Wink) by Trump’s Inappropriate Tweets (Wink, Wink)

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Attorney General William Barr is, like, really very...

Tennessee Democrats Considering a 48-Hour Waiting Period for Erections

NASHVILLE, TENNESSEE -- In 2015, conservatives in Deep Red Tennesee seriously...

Study Shows 85% of Monopoly Money Used to Snort Pixy Stix

A new study just published by the National Institute of Studying...

President Trump Devastated First Lady Forgot Him On Valentine’s Day Again This Year

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's Valentine's Day today, but that doesn't mean...

Pundit Who Spent 35 Years Turning GOP Into Cult Trump Could Exploit Has Advice On Democratic Nominee

For thirty-five years, William G. Williamson has written op-ed columns for...

Hillary Clinton Offers to Represent Roger Stone at Future Parole Hearings

LAKE FOREST, NEW YORK -- Former Secretary of State and 2016...

5 Reasons You Should Not Vote for Bernie Sanders

Should you vote for Bernie Sanders? We have no clue. Seriously....

Middle-Aged Man Should Probably Be Better at Fucking By Now

LAGO DEL FLACIDO, CALIFORNIA -- Skip Languido is a 42 year...