Yearly Archives: 2020

A List of The Totally Innocent Offspring Who Might Get a Trump Pardon

Presidential pardons are quite powerful. If there's a federal law or...

Trump Asks Pentagon to ‘Quietly’ Put a Dozen F-35 Jets in His Florida Storage Unit

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- While he continues to wage losing legal battles...

Horny Jesus Reminds You He’s Also the Reason for the Squeezin’

SEXXXY HEAVEN -- Horny Jesus Christ, the super-sexed-up version of the...

Trump Tells His Kids He Expects To Be Called “President Daddy” The Rest of His Life

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A lot is going to have to change...

Report: FBI Investigating Whether Trump Spent $3 Million in Wisconsin Buying Votes

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The FBI has opened a new investigation into...

In 5-4 Decision, Supreme Court Says Jesus Is the Reason for the Season

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The U.S. Supreme Court ruled last week, in...

Trumpist Strikes a Blow for Freedom by Giving His Grandmother Covid-19 on Thanksgiving

DIPSHIT COVE, MICHIGAN -- Stephan Crowzer, a 36-year old self-described "die...

Trump Asks SCOTUS to Force States to Count Votes Using Three-Fifths Compromise

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The failing Donald Trump re-election campaign has filed...

After Playing Fetch With Tiffany, Trump Says His Bone Spurs Feel Just Fine

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Outgoing President Donald J. Trump is resting comfortably,...

President Finds It Hard To Believe 80 Million Fuckin’ Assholes and Losers Voted For Biden and Not Him

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In the final analysis, President Donald J. Trump...