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Trump Campaign Buys Hundreds of Thousands of Tiki Torches in Anticipation of Rally Crowd...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump's re-election campaign issued a financial report today containing details of a large wholesale purchase of over half a...
Barr: DOJ Wants to Give Roger Stone Credit for Time Served Under Trump’s Balls
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Attorney General William Barr wrote a letter to the judge overseeing the federal government's case against political operative Roger Stone which...
Trump Appoints Giuliani as DOJ’s New Director of Democrat Investigations
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This week, Attorney General William Barr admitted that the Department of Justice has started an official process by which to handle...
WDC Launching ‘Disney-‘ Streaming Service for Customers With Trump Level IQs
HOLLYWOO, CALIFORNIA -- At this point, a couple of months since its launch, the streaming service Disney+ simply must be considered a rousing success....
Trump’s Budget Seeks Additional $2T For “Hamberders, Covfefe, and Golf Trips”
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Trump administration released its 2020 budget proposal on Monday, and while the usual team of surrogates and supporters rallied around...
Trump Wants Impeachment Witnesses Shipped Off to Border Camps
WASHINGTON, D.C -- President Donald Trump wasted no time at all seeking his retribution on administration officials who testified -- mostly all under subpoena...
Trump Orders Brad Pitt Sent to Gitmo for ‘Treasonous’ Oscars Speech
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald J. Trump has issued an official order to the justice department, demanding that Attorney General William Barr indict actor...
Stephen Miller’s Hair Says It Doesn’t See Anything Unnatural or Fake Looking About Trump’s...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- White House Senior Fascism Adviser Stephen Miller's hair appeared on a conservative talk radio show this morning and blasted "media elites...
Devin Nunes Assures Trump He Won’t Stop Sucking Him Off Even Though Impeachment Trial...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sources are reporting that late last night, Congressman Devin Nunes delivered via Bovine Express -- a service that courriers mail via...
Trump Frustrated With Iowa Caucuses Because He Doesn’t Know Who to Have Ukraine Investigate...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A clearly perturbed President Donald Trump told reporters today he's feeling "bigly upset" by the lack of a clear winner from...
