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Mike Pence Plans to Leave D.C. and Move In Next Door to Trump’s Ass
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- While most Americans have been keeping a close eye on outgoing President Donald Trump as he struggles to cope with losing...
Trump Demands Electoral College Make Joe Biden Repeat His Senior Year
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Electoral College meets today to officially declare former Vice President Joe Biden the winner of last month's election, making it...
Supreme Court Decides: ‘Fuck Trump’s Feelings’
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In three days, the Electoral College will meet and confer a Bachelor in Stupidity degree on Donald Trump Jr, and also...
Trump’s Lawyers Ask Supreme Court to Declare His Hands and Genitals ‘Normal’
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The outgoing president isn't done filing lawsuits with the Supreme Court. Already having joined the lawsuit filed by Texas Attorney General...
Trump Sues Trump Campaign for Losing
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Over the course of his single term as president, Donald Trump has gotten the American people quite used to "unorthodox," "unprecedented,"...
Trump Claims Alternative Victory in Alternative Election and Will Stay On As President of...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Donald Trump is growing more and more desperate to hold onto power. Since losing last month's election quite decisively once all...
Trump Officially Transitions Eric and Don Jr. to Joe Biden
As of the time of publication, this outlet can confirm that the Trump administration has begun the process of legally transitioning the president's least...
Trump Tells Supreme Court He ‘Really, Really, Really WANTED to Be President Again’
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Throughout his presidency, there has been one word used almost incessantly about Donald Trump's approach to, well, everything. That word is...
As Biden Is Sworn In, Trump Wants Air Force One Loaded With Supporters That...
Next month, President-elect Joe Biden will be sworn in as the 46th President of the United States. Even though that truth does not sit...
Outgoing President Trump Mulling One More Popular Vote Loss in 2024
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Admitting it publicly will not and cannot change his fate, and within a little over a month's time, Donald John Trump...
