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Trump Starting New Social Media Company With Ivanka
WASHINGTON. D.C. -- Reportedly, outgoing, one-term, permanently impeached, lame duck, never won the popular vote, President Donald J. Trump was absolutely livid when Twitter...
Trump Says He Won’t Participate in Biden’s Inauguration or The Next Olympics
It was never really that much in doubt, but outgoing, lame duck, one-term, permanently impeached President Donald Trump confirmed today that he will not attend Joe...
Cruz Says He and His Ugly Wife Are Appalled By Pro-Trump Violent Mob He...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Just days before the violent pro-Trump mob ransacked the capitol building, Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Trump's Taint) was riling up angry Republicans...
ISIS Arranges Trade With U.S. For Hawley, Cruz, and Trump
The details of a new blockbuster trade in the Major Leagues of Religious Demagoguery are starting to emerge, though a bit slowly. According to...
Trump Assures MAGA Nation He’s Not Yet Tired of Winning at Losing
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- An angry, ranting, outgoing, one-term, permanently impeached, lame duck President Donald Trump spoke to a massive crowd of riled-up members of...
Mike Pence Will Certify Biden’s Win, But Not Take Trump’s Dong Out of His...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This might the toughest spot Mike Pence has found himself in since he "accidentally" stumbled upon a late-night broadcast of the...
Mexico Offers to Pay for Trump’s Moving Vans
THIS STORY WAS REPUBLISHED WITH DIRECT PERMISSION FROM SISTER PUBLICATION THE PASTICHE POST.
MEXICO CITY, MEXICO -- The Mexican government has offered to foot the...
Trump Wants Congress to Declare Him President of the Confederacy
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Before becoming the 45th most intelligent President of the United States ever, Donald Trump was an alleged businessman. Throughout the 1970's,...
Trump Already Broke New Year’s Resolution to Not Be a Fucking Moron
His friends and family, and even close political advisers, all warned him against doing it. He was told how risky it was, and how...
Mexico Offers to Pay for Trump’s Movers
MEXICO CITY, MEXICO -- The Mexican government has offered to foot the bill for any company hired to move outgoing President Donald Trump's belongings...
